me venting about whats on my mind.

I JUST FUCKING NEED YOU HERE WITH ME.
is that too much to ask for? i know you want the same,
well atleast i think you do, but if you really care for me..
like you say you do, please just come see me.
thats all im asking for.
i know your getting sick of me, i know you cant stand me
anymore, admit it. You dont like me as much as you used to.
It kind of sounds like your putting on an act. are you?
Dont care about my feelings, cause i dont care about mines.
No one shouldnt care about my feelings if i dont.
Im going crazy just thinking about you.
I cant help but just cry while writing this because you are
the one i love. It might sound stupid to you, since we hardly
see each other. But, deep down inside of me, your here.
your here with me everynight, putting me to sleep.
The phone calls at like 3am, sometimes 4am, make me smile.
but when we arguee, it never helps. I kills me inside to know
that you dont see me like before. You talk about me changing up
on you, haha. Lets talk about you changing up on me. You used to
send me cute text messages while i was in class, randomly saying
i miss you, when like 10 minutes ago we hung up the phone.
You used to tell me i was beautiful, and call me your princess.
Those kind of things used to make me the happiest girl alive.
How you used to make me go to bed, because i had school.
How you used to just talk about the future, and what you thought
it had in store for us. How you actually thought i was the one for you.
I bet you dont think about that today, dont you? am i right?
You hate me for not seeing you. You hate me that much that you almost broke up with me because of that. Ohh and did i mention that i cried when that happened. I never cry. I dont cry for boys. Ive never cried for a boy my entire life. Feel special because the moment i arrived home and was alone locked up in my room after you said you wanted a "break" with me, I bursted out into tears. I couldnt hold it in any longer. I needed you by my side, but i realized i had just lost you. I had just lost the one person who i dont see ever, but i love very much. Thats why i cant loose you. I might sound crazy, who gives a fuck.. i dont im just trying to get my point across that i need you. I need you to tell me that im yours, that you still like me. That im funny, and sweet. But nooo, those words changed to "Awesome" and "Cool" you never say anything nice to me yeah you say the usual, but you used to be unique with your words. You used to use them right, you had a way with them. But i dont know. shit is changing. But the funny thing is, that all i am doing is blabbing about you and not talking about myself. so lets get to that... I still like you... NOO! i love you! i loved you for the longest time. The moment me and you started talk again, i knew what love was. and it was you. You were love you were sent to me to show me what love meant. and i thought you were best thing in the world. I always thought that, and i still do. you are my rock. i need to talk to you atleast once a day to manage. I try talking to you more but baby, it hard when you dont have your phone anymore. Your probably reading this and realizing a bunch of stuff. And its stuff you should of known a long time ago. Like the love i have for you. I adore the shit out of you, i just wish we could see each other more. ha, you know whats funny, i lost a guy friend cause of you. Im not trying to blame it on you.. im just saying. He texted me a few times the other day... and uh i didnt write back because i had a boyfriend and what would have i looked like if i had a boyfriend and texting another boy?!?! Well to make this story short, he kept texting and texting, and i never wrote back to him he even started up with the myspace stuff and next thing you know i get hate text from him, talking about i hate you, now that you have a boyfriend you have to start forgetting about people, huh.. i was confused for a minute because i didnt do anything to him for him to be saying such harsh words to me like that.. but yeah HE HATES ME, now hes trying to regain his friendship with me, but guess what.. i still dont pay attention! So in other words, yeah im very loyal to you, my heart tells me to be loyal to you, because i love you! i dont know why i havent told you that i loved you yet. I tried tell you a few times but i thought you would of reacted like if i was stupid, since we dont see each other. lol you asked me if i loved you the other day and i said no! its hard to over come these words that ive only said to certain people but never anyone who ive been with and in love with.
Well i seriously dont know how to end this so im just going to leave this at that. I miss you, i love you, and can you please come see me. =D